11 Comments

  1. Bill
    November 11, 2015 @ 10:30 am

    Thank you once again from Shores of Lake Erie. The words flow for me at 4 am to get dressed and go for a ride. I am 65 starting to cycle the last few years and you inspire your truth of change in myself .Enjoy Your day Bill

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  2. Allysse Riordan
    November 11, 2015 @ 9:44 pm

    Great words of advice 🙂
    This is how I’m now approaching any trip I do: take some time off, go somewhere, see what happens. I’ve tried planning and expecting things before but within less than an hour I would inevitably ditch the plan. So now I don’t even bother about planning beyond the very basics.

    Reply

  3. P
    November 12, 2015 @ 12:22 am

    Not sure how I feel about this article….. it seems, in parts, to have a negativity that I haven’t seen in your other writing yet the point seems to imply a positive.. hmmm

    Reply

  4. Amy (Two Drifters)
    November 12, 2015 @ 8:46 pm

    This post has humbled me as a writer and as a human.

    “Be brave by separating yourself from the world of self-congratulatory braggers, quipping tired philosophies and Mark Twain quotes on social media. Go out instead and discover that a planet dominated by wordless humility is a far more inspiring thing. Do it for the sheer bloody-minded pointlessness of it. Do it for its own sake. Do it because you want to.”

    Reply

  5. Sally Eathorne
    November 13, 2015 @ 3:19 pm

    Thanks Tom for this article and enlightening me about the http://waitbutwhy.com/ website which I had never heard of before and will definitely be reading from now on.

    A conundrum for me this article. I am naturally a positive kind of person and always scheming and hatching new ideas of what to do next. .’ Happiness = Reality – Expectations’ is another way for me of saying ‘Eat a toad for breakfast then all day you won’t be disappointed’ which I think I have probably adapted from the famous quote by Nicolas Chamfort [1741-1794] and have told myself often over many years whenever I have actually been disappointed that something did not quite turn out as expected However, for some strange reason, this hasn’t stopped me from picking myself up and starting anew with as much optimism as I ever had..So I guess it’s a rule I do not live by but comfort myself with in a weird way in the face of disappointment.
    So, I do feel that to live by this lowering of expectations would somehow leave one lacking in aiming high with personal goals and challenges.
    From your link to this article from the quirky ‘Wait but Why’ chaps, I then read about Elon Musk in another of their articles, {what an incredible person] who could never have achieved his extraordinary goals if he lived by this rule of thumb.
    I can’t help feeling that is has more to do with personality types in the end and how one deals with challenges and disappointment in life.
    x

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    • Tom Allen
      November 13, 2015 @ 6:29 pm

      Thanks, Sally, for this very thoughtful comment.

      On reflection, I can now see something I didn’t before, which is that perhaps it is not so much that expectations can lead to disappointment; rather that it is helpful to understand when we are in a position to influence what happens to us (in which our expectations can drive great things to happen), and when we are not (in which our expectations are just as likely to lead to disappointment).

      In more concrete terms, I now approach my travels with as close to no agenda as possible. I set the starting conditions, then run with it from there, because I know that what happens on the way will have very little relation to what I might want to happen. On the other hand, when releasing a film, I fully intend to try to take over the world with it, because there’s no harm in aiming high – in that context.

      Does that make any sense?

      Reply

  6. Sally Eathorne
    November 16, 2015 @ 9:15 am

    Hi Tom,
    Yes it does make sense [well, to me anyway] to truly experience travelling it’s best to stay un-blinkered and be open to what the path ahead throws at you – to a degree of course . But when being creative, like your film making for instance, then reach for the stars I say!
    Best wishes x

    Reply

  7. Nina
    November 27, 2015 @ 9:34 pm

    Liked the article a lot, Tom! Enjoyed reading it!

    Reply

  8. rorywriter
    November 27, 2015 @ 11:05 pm

    Blessed is he who expecteth nothing for he shall never be disappointed.

    Reply

    • Tom Allen
      December 2, 2015 @ 12:31 pm

      Quite!

      Reply

      • Bill
        December 2, 2015 @ 2:52 pm

        Now thinking is involve?

        Reply

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